A lot of people have asked me what I feel like, about to be a father…If I’m excited, nervous, scared, etc…I think I never really knew how I felt until recently. A lot of what I’ve felt has been summed up as “I’m ready for it, but I don’t know what I’m ready for…”
I’ve also got asked a thousand times especially at work, “You’re how old and you’re married?” Always a different way of asking the same question, and yes it gets very old. Originally I defended myself by asking how old they were when they got married, and occassionally I get people who got married at the same age Nicole and I did…
But if there was one feeling that I feel now towards being young, married, and about to be a father (tomorrow morning in fact), it would be thankful, utterly, entirely, undeservingly thankful. The reason why I feel like that is b/c I would be an adolescent playing video games talking about stupid things watching tv and doing nothing productive. At least that’s how I was before these things picked me up. I love having to be responsible for my wife, and now my son. I have to be strong. I have to make money. I have to be a husband. I have to be a father. I have to be mature. I’m much further along than I would be otherwise. I have to be a man. Nothing I could do could make me this way except by a graceful push by God.
And I’m very thankful for that.